On Sleep Deprivation as a New Mommy of Two

Big brother loved his baby brother from the moment they met.

What were my first few weeks as a Mommy of two like? Well, they involved permanently bloodshot eyes, wild hair, and an inability to make coherent sentences. I feel like people passing me on my rare trips out of the house probably thought I looked like a druggie. These trips were very rare considering the fact that lifting the stroller or wearing my then 6-7 something pounder actually made my belly ache. It didn't help that it is flu season and my pediatrician mother and Facebook feed bombarded me with seemingly endless stories of sick babies.  I would wince every time I heard a sniffle or a sneeze, ready to bolt back home. (Speaking of which, is my throat a little sore or am I imagining it??)  Most times I was too tired to feel the need to leave the house anyway.

On our way home from the hospital.

My little one seemed intent on only sleeping during the day and my two year old refused to nap, making their schedules perfectly opposite (coincidence?  I think not ;). And in the middle of that somewhere my body was trying to recover from pregnancy and giving birth, not to mention spending an immense amount of energy on breastfeeding.  My emotions were spinning from shifting hormones combined with feeling an enormous amount of pressure to learn how to fill my new role as Mommy to two.  I was trying my best to ignore the fact that our house was in shambles around me.  I mostly just felt like there wasn't enough of me to go around in general. 

Adjusting to life with two littles is not easy. Sleep deprivation with one baby was hard but a newborn combined with a possibly jealous toddler who seemed to decide to become as difficult as possible the day you came home from the hospital? It was rough. 

I will be transparent with everyone. The sleep deprivation was real. Real to the point that I sometimes worried it was dangerous. Falling asleep holding the baby was my greatest fear. One that fed endless nightmares. Perhaps hormone changes and new mother protectiveness fed the nightmares too, but extreme sleep deprivation was the major culprit in my opinion. Exhaustion seems to lengthen that space in time between sleeping and waking. A space in which my body is awake but my brain is still dreaming. A hypnopompic state is the official term.

A rare moment of sleep... I can't help but stare.

In this state, nightmares become real. And I hallucinated.  My recurring hallucination in the weeks after we brought my youngest home centered around my recurring nightmare in which I fell asleep holding him. I woke up terrified that he had suffocated in my arms or next to me in the bed.  I have a stuffed dog I sleep with and I would wake up cradling him, terrified and frantic. I was convinced he was the baby and I would attempt to arouse him (unsuccessfully of course).  One night, my husband awoke too and heard me freaking out. He told me the baby was fine and that what I was holding wasn't the baby.  My nightmare felt so real that I argued back, angrily since he never even checked to see. "How do you know?!" I insisted before my brain slowly shook off the fog of sleep and I found my crying infant (which is what had awakened me in the first place) safe in his bassinet.

I love walks with my boys!

Thankfully, this low point passed as Coen's sleep stretched out from one hour (yes, he only slept an hour at a time many nights!) to now sometimes as much as 3 and a half hour windows.  The holidays were also nice because having family here meant naps for me and help with the kids and daily tasks.  My body has healed a lot in the past month as well.  But, most importantly, my toddler seems to have adjusted back to his normal sweet self that sleeps and eats and isn't a holy terror all day.  

My precious angel.  

Don't get me wrong though! I'm so grateful for my beautiful healthy children and supportive family. I don't know how I'd have survived without my husband giving me naps and pep talks those early weeks. I've done a lot of cuddling and breathing in that precious newborn scent. I know that these days of tinyhood are all too few and I'm soaking them up much more intensely this time around.

We are finding our balance and a new normal now. And, today, after snuggling down with my 2 year old for his bedtime song and cuddling my almost 5 week old who passed out at my breast, I breathe in his sweet milky scent and can't help but think, "this is heaven."

There is no one I would rather be than these boys' Mommy. I'm blessed beyond words. Now, it's off to bed before my sleep window closes and the fun/chaos starts all over again!

My Second Birth Story

Let me start by saying, I'm pretty much as unlikely a candidate to choose a home birth as they come but after my delivery this time and fighting pushy nurses and doctors for hours while in labor, I can see why some mothers choose that route. I had the delivery I wanted but it took a lot of standing up for myself and my (reasonable and educated) desires.  If it weren't for my medical training, I might have given into some of the bullying and had a very different outcome.

So to my story... The Tuesday before Thanksgiving was my ideal day for our second little guy to arrive. My doctor was on call and my best friend was staying with us so she could to watch my 2 year old son.  In hopes of convincing the little guy to come that day, I had my membranes stripped Monday afternoon.  My husband was able to be there and took me walking afterward.  (I am convinced this is key for stripping to work.)  My Captain husband went Army on me and we walked a lot.  First all around the hospital (about 2 miles) then, after dinner, every inch of our neighborhood.  My back and pelvis ached by the end of it (not unusual at this point in my pregnancy).

39 weeks and after a lot of walking

My best friend and her husband came over that night and we stayed up until about midnight. I never went to bed because I began having contractions 2-3 minutes apart. I was excited that they were so close together since I'd heard that second babies come faster. Thankfully, I had no idea this statistic did not apply to me. 

I told the hubby to sleep a little.  I laid down for maybe 2 minutes then paced and packed.  I woke him up at 1:30AM. We walked some more but the contractions were getting more intense so, for fear of waiting too long (my OB had strongly recommended I not stay at home as long as I did with my first delivery if I wanted an epidural), we headed to the hospital around 3AM, leaving my son asleep in his bed with my friends watching the monitor. (Best scenario ever! I had spent so much time worrying over having to drop him off somewhere in the middle of the night.)

On the drive is when it got a little weird. Walking kept my contractions at 2-3 minutes; sitting they slipped to 4-6. Still hospital worthy according to my OB but I worried about them spacing out more and stopping.  I was ready at this point and my mom was already on her way. We stopped and walked two more times in random parking lots just in case.  Besides, I like to walk when I'm in labor. Everything inside me is antsy and pushes me to keep moving.

At the hospital, they hooked me up to the monitors and confirmed that my contractions were strong and regular.  They insisted I lay in bed to be monitored for 2 hours before I could follow the "intermittent monitoring" order my OB had written on the chart.  (This was her promise that I would be allowed to walk so that I wouldn't wait so long to come to the hospital.)

Things went a little differently after those two hours than I had pictured.  Two different residents checked me 2 hours apart and both said I was 3cm dilated (one told us "3, almost 4" but must have reported 3 to the attending).  First, I was disappointed that I was only 3 or 4cm dilated because I had been 5cm with my first son at this level of pain and intensity of contractions (which is when I decided to go to the hospital with him too), but the biggest disappointment came from the medical team.  Based on "no change" in my cervix, it was decided somehow that I wasn't in labor (huh?!) and that they would send me home.  Now here's the kicker... a nurse told me that I would be sent home unless I agreed to have them start a Pitocin drip.

(I need to take a moment to say that Pitocin is a topic I will blog about one of these days because I feel very strongly about it.  Studies are there saying that Pitocin is very overused and associated with significant risk and that it should only be used when medically necessary. Yet the overuse continues and I've heard so many stories of less than ideal outcomes... But this is too big a topic to do justice to it here, so stay tuned for more on this later.)

I refused both the Pitocin and going home after listening to the attending physician monologue about how cervical checks are very subjective (he actually compared it to reaching into a wet sock) but never once checked me himself.  He also based his reasoning that I wasn't in active labor on the fact that I was talking to him (between contractions, hello!) and that I didn't "look in pain enough."  He never addressed our concerns about the obvious contractions on the monitor (that had been at less than 5 minutes apart for 5 hours at this point) or listened to my husband and mom say that I am in pain even if I don't fit his stereotype of pain reactions.  Nor did he give any credence to the fact that I had been in labor before and knew what it felt like (and he hadn't and couldn't! though I held back from saying this to him).

You can imagine how furious that man made me.

Perhaps I would have believed him that I wasn't in labor if this was my first child.  And perhaps I would've agreed to Pitocin if I was post-term or if I had much less knowledge on the subject but to me, his approach was all wrong.  If I wasn't in labor (which I knew I was), starting Pitocin = induction, something I didn't want unless absolutely necessary (because of the risks).  And if I was in labor, the monitor clearly showed strong, regular contractions and I didn't need a drug meant to induce contractions.  As long as the baby is happy, there is no time table, within reason and when membranes are intact, for the baby to be born once contractions start.

My doctor came and saved the day (thank goodness!) not too long afterward.  She checked me and declared that I was 4cm dilated and had been 2cm the evening before in her office and that although slow that was progress.  She stripped my membranes again and things really took off.  I was ready for an epidural (because of how much my pain increased) at 5cm not too long after that.

My nurse (a new one and a great one!) was surprised when I asked for the epidural.  Somehow, without ever being asked, it was decided that I didn't want an epidural.  In fact, she seemed concerned that I wanted to go home (what?! They were the ones trying to send me away! Hand-over between the night nurse and day nurse obviously failed).  She also thought I had not had regular prenatal care and was therefore missing lab work that was required in order to receive an epidural.  Thankfully, all of that was cleared up fairly quickly and after a quick refusal of the resident anesthesiologist, the attending gave me a perfect epidural.

Interestingly, the epidural revved up my contractions even more (the opposite of my last delivery).  Eventually, my doctor said I was completely dilated, and my nurse told me to let her know when it was "baby time."  I did and she called for my doctor and told me she'd be there in 5 minutes.  I remember saying "that is way too long! It's baby time!"  He was about to be born.  I convinced the nurse to check me just in case and after that, she somehow quickly procured my doctor.  I have video after my son was born and you can hear the nurse telling my OB "I didn't know she was THAT close." ;)

 And, long story short, after nearly 18 hours of labor (more than with my first son!), my healthy, squalling, beautiful 6lb 13oz son was born with just 2 pushes and no tears. The bed was never disassembled into stirrups (there wasn't time) so he was within my reach (and view) the whole time and came straight to my arms.  He nursed a few minutes later and I held him skin to skin until I couldn't handle not knowing his weight any longer.

The beginning was long but the ending was perfect.

 I could've done without the battling in between but otherwise, I wouldn't have had it any other way.

Baby #2 Bumpdate: the Eighth Month

I am full term and feeling it.  I am getting eager to meet this new little guy, although I still want him to at least wait until next week.  I don't feel quite ready yet.  But, as I sit here and think, other than being completely packed (which is hard to do because I don't want to pack away clothes and not wear them for weeks), we are pretty much good to go.  Maybe not feeling ready is just a sign that he's not quite ready yet either.  I guess we will see.

At any rate, the car seat base is installed, his bag is packed, Liam's big brother presents are packed, my bag is mostly packed, the bassinet sheets are washed and it is ready in our master bedroom along with his newborn clothes and diapers... we even brought the swing downstairs tonight.  I've had all the discussions about what I want in different scenarios with my OB as well.  All that is left now is waiting and trying to rest and spend as much one-on-one time with Liam as possible.

How far along today: 37 weeks + 4 days

Baby size:  At 37 weeks, baby should be about the size of a winter melon, 19-22 inches long and 6.5 lbs.  At 34 weeks, Coen was approximately 5lbs and 3oz (as much as 5lbs was the What to Expect estimate) so he may be just a bit bigger. Despite that, my fundal height at the last appointment was 3cm smaller than gestational age and 1cm less than the previous week's visit so we are thinking baby has dropped (which I could already tell). 

Trimester: Third trimester is tough but we are almost there!

Gender: As I announced in my Gender Reveal Post, it's a BOY!  

Name: This little guy's name will be Coen Gabor.  See my What's in a Name Post to see how we chose this name and why it is so special to us.

Movement: I think it is getting kind of tight in there.  This baby boy seems to prefer jabbing an elbow, knee or foot out versus wiggling around like he used to.  Sometimes I can feel him try to stretch out by kicking my ribs and shifting his head even further down onto my bladder.

Contractions: The Braxton-Hicks have sure been picking up lately.  Today, I felt like every time I bent over (which of course is pretty often because of big brother), I had a contraction.  They seem to be accomplishing a little at least.  I was almost 2cm and 40% effaced yesterday.  I know this means pretty much nothing but it's good to know that progress is being made none-the-less.

Cravings: Bagel bites and Halloween candy.  The first is such a horrible craving but I can't shake it.  It is ever present and very strong.  I just try not to give in too much or like today balance it with a plate of fruits and veggies first.  The second is a craving of convenience.  Here's to hoping all the candy is gone soon!

Aversions: What are those?  Just give me food and lots of it!  

The Not So Fun Pregnancy Stuff:  I had a lot of muscle cramps this month that I just couldn't figure out what to do about.  My athlete husband recommended I may be low on electrolytes so I tried Gatorade and bananas with little improvement.  I did however learn that my prenatal has absolutely no potassium in it so I realize that adding these foods was a good thing either way.  I asked my OB and she had no idea and just recommended I continue my vitamin and what I was already trying.  My mother finally suggested I may be low on calcium when I described how the spasms were worsening to the point of my muscles contracting when I tried to stretch my limbs out first thing in the morning and my finger did something similar while I was cooking one night.  I started supplementing and focusing on more dairy intake and I am happy to say that the spasms are gone.  The prenatal I take only fulfills 12% of daily value for calcium so this makes sense. I wanted to share my story in hopes that if someone else is having this issue they try this sooner!  (And here's to hoping my teeth survived the time it took us to figure this out!)

Coen has dropped in the last week or so so sleep has gotten a little better.  I still wake up in pain (mostly my ribs and upper back) or having to pee at least 3 times a night but that is much better than before.  I haven't actually had to get up before morning just because the pain was so bad that I couldn't sleep any longer regardless of how exhausted I was like I was doing before.  Still, by the end of the day, I am utterly and completely exhausted every single day (though I am sure my toddler has a lot to do with this!).

Most exciting moments:  Our 34 week ultrasound was the high point of this month.  We were told the wonderful news that the amniotic fluid was normal once more at an AFI of 13.2.  I also got to see Coen's face on 3D, which is always fun.  The quality of the picture reassured me the fluid would be fine before I even read the report.  Coen even gave us a little smirk and opened his eyes!  It was incredible!

What I'm most looking forward to:  Coen's birthday is pretty much the biggest thing coming up now.  His due date is less than 3 weeks away!  I'm kind of hoping he decides to come a few days early but if he's like his big brother, it may be more like a few days late.  It would be a huge thing to be thankful for for sure though if he made it by Thanksgiving.  We have a variety of plans (thanks to some wonderful family and friends) for what to do with big brother on the big day based on when little brother decides to make his grand entry into the world.  Hopefully, we are covered for any day he decides now!

Big Brother: Big brother turned two this month!  He had a blast at his Elmo party.  He also loved Boo at the Zoo (he danced for over an hour) and was in heaven on Halloween night.  I'm actually having trouble explaining to him that Halloween is over.  I started trying to focus on doing some Thanksgiving crafts with him so that the coming holiday seems more fun to him.  I don't know what it was about Halloween but maybe it was promised candy and that everything was orange (his favorite color) but he was (and is) obsessed with that holiday.

I'm eager to see how he adjusts to being a big brother.  He has a teenage mutant ninja turtle pillow pet to give Coen.  He has one in orange and we got Coen a blue one from Liam since Liam loves his so much.  Liam is getting a build-a-bear Michaelangelo (that he actually built with Mommy and Daddy this month) and a recorded story book read to him by Mommy to keep him company while we are in the hospital, and a big brother book and pin.  I am most excited about seeing what he thinks of what must seem like a mythical baby to him when he is no longer a concept in Mommy's belly and can be touched and seen.  And how long it'll be until he tells me to give him "back" like he did a friend's baby we saw last week ;).

Baby #2 Bumpdate: the 7th month

The next few weeks are going to be pretty busy with a blur of doctor's appointments and fall plans with the family.  This month is my oldest son's birthday month so we have a few traditions.  Boo at the Zoo, trick-or-treating, a visit to the local pumpkin patch, pumpkin carving  painting, and his 2nd birthday party are definites. We're also finally adding a new tradition of apple picking.

As for how I'm feeling lately...the dreaded rib pain is back.  I had that really bad with Liam and I've been hoping I'd avoid it this time since second babies tend to sit lower.  No such luck.  Laying down seems to be the worst.  The tech at our 31 week ultrasound made me feel better though when she said she couldn't visualize the baby's spine because his back was "jammed under" my rib cage. No joke!  That's exactly what it feels like.  At least baby boy is head down and ready for his birthday as far as that goes.

How far along today: 33 weeks + 3 days

Baby size:  At 33 weeks, baby should be about the size of a honeydew, 19 inches long and 4.5 lbs.  At 31 weeks, Coen was 3lbs and 12oz (3.2lbs was the What to Expect estimate) so he may be just a bit bigger. Despite that, my fundal height at the last appointment was 2cm smaller than gestational age, which is what got us the 31 week ultrasound in the first place. 

Trimester: Oh third trimester, you are a tough one... You're making me anxious to have this baby boy here even though it is WAY too early still.  

Gender: As I announced in my Gender Reveal Post, it's a BOY!  

Name: This little guy's name will be Coen Gabor.  See my What's in a Name Post to see how we chose this name and why it is so special to us.

Movement: This baby boy moves A LOT!  The ultrasound made him move, me getting up at night because of Liam or to go to the bathroom wakes him up and he becomes crazy active (not helping with trying to go back to sleep), and I've noticed a few loud noises will start up his crazy antics too.

Cravings: Chocolate chip cookies and sour candy.  Although, I really just like to eat, especially carbs of all kinds (and especially sweets unfortunately).  Thank goodness I passed that 3 hour glucose tolerance test!

Aversions: What are those?  Just give me food and lots of it!  

The Not So Fun Pregnancy Stuff:  The weather is FINALLY starting to cool down! But not fast enough.  Highs are in the mid-80s (which feels like high 90s to me) still! This is a huge thing for me since we are still having to run our AC pretty hard on warm days to keep me from feeling like I am melting into a puddle.  Shorts and tank tops are often what I wear while I dress my toddler in long sleeves and pants on cooler days.  I'm pretty sure some people think I'm nuts but I just feel so hot that jeans sound horrible most days.  The forecast for the coming 10 days looks promising for more chill in the air though!

Sleep has been very rough lately.  This is probably my biggest struggle in the past few weeks.  Liam had a rough few weeks.  I also just wake up in pain a lot.  My back and neck bother me but the rib pain I meantioned earlier is the worst.  I just feel bruised, like I've been in a car accident and can't lay on my ribs.  Unfortunately, any way I lay puts pressure on my rib cage.  I desperately googled ways to relieve it and have come up with a survival routine.  I take a shower and stretch before bed.  I try to avoid laying down until the moment we are going to sleep then try to take as much pressure off with my body pillow as possible.  This has seemed to work a few nights.  I'm also anxiously awaiting him to "drop."  That was promised as relief online, but since Liam never did drop, I'm worried that'll be true this time too.  But honestly, all my research mostly just let me know that the rib pain is likely here until delivery day.  Delivering is the only cure.  (Yikes...I have 6 weeks and change til my due date and Liam was late...)

Sciatica is like a ninja.  It comes out of nowhere but strong and hard.  One minute I'm scrubbing the bathroom and the next I can't even walk up the stairs or put any weight on one of my legs (usually the left one).

Most exciting moments:  Getting a 31 week ultrasound!  I was a little disappointed that Coen wouldn't cooperate and show us his face but the little blurry, melty looking tidbits that I did get to see made me happy and I can't truly be disappointed when he looks perfectly healthy. 

Worst moment: The day after our ultrasound, I had an OB visit and found out that Coen's amniotic fluid is measuring "low normal".  In fact, after a little research I discovered that at 8.9, for his gestational age, he was 0.1 away from "low" (5th percentile) not just "low normal."  I have another ultrasound next week to follow the fluid levels.  Coen looks perfectly healthy but if the fluid becomes too low, I will have to be admitted to the hospital for bed rest and IV fluids.  I worry that we will have to induce early and it is still REALLY early.  For now, I'm just trying to drink lots of water and not worry too much since it won't change anything.

What I'm most looking forward to: I'm looking forward to all the fun October activities we have planned and the hubs finally having some time off this month to do all of them with us.  We really need some time together to have fun, finish the house, and relax before we become a family of four in a month and a half.  I'm also looking forward to seeing Coen's sweet face again next week.  Ultrasounds could never get old to me!

Big Brother: Liam is turning 2 in 2 weeks!  That is crazy.  We are planning a little Elmo birthday party for him at home.  He is majorly into Elmo right now.  He could watch Elmo videos we rent from the library all day if we let him.  That and the YouTube videos for Choo Choo Soul's "Alphabet" and "All Aboard" songs as well as the Mickey Mouse Club House intro song. 

He had two weeks of waking up a lot of nights but hopefully this has passed (it has been over a week since the last time now).  He refuses to nap some days so that routine somehow got messed up too.  Hopefully this will be a short phase since Mommy is exhausted.

Liam's latest obsession is Halloween so I've made some effort to decorate the house a little for Halloween and do some crafts that follow the theme as well.  His enthusiasm is very rewarding.  He exclaims "Ham-a-meen!" and adds "craft" or "art" or "disz (decoration in Hungarian)" and repeats it so excitedly that I'm starting to love Halloween stuff too :).

We've been working on getting Coen's room organized and Liam loves that.  He likes pointing out socks and clothes.  And he exclaims "Kutch-Ko!" when we head toward his room.  He points out daily that "Kutch-Ko" is in my belly.  He also identifies baby things like cribs in the store with his baby brother's name. We had a play date with a little boy who has a baby sister and I tried to use her to explain that Coen would be a baby like that very soon.   I'm not sure how much he understands but he seems excited for now. 

Baby #2 Bumpdate: 5th and 6th month

I know, I know.  I've pretty much completely disappeared for the last few months but we've been busy settling into our new home and going on some long-overdue vacations.  At any rate, I am also overdue for a bumpdate so here goes a combination one for months 5 and 6.  Hopefully, I'll be back in the groove next month.

I'm now into my 3rd trimester and starting to feel it.  Back pain, especially in my upper back and shoulders, has been the bane of my existence this last week or so. Bending over is a task that I already try to avoid as often as possible because of my back but also because Coen is in the way :).  My energy never was very high last trimester, but that's to be expected chasing a very energetic almost-two-year old (Eeek! I can't believe he will be two in less than two months!) around.  And now that third trimester has started, I just feel exhausted pretty much constantly.

Coen continues to be more energetic than his brother was.  He's already woken me up from a sound sleep (and if you know me, that takes some effort!) with his kicking.  Daddy felt him for sure a few weeks ago and was like "what is he doing in there?!"  I wish I could peek in and see because I'm wondering the same thing!  He seems to be practicing for some sport that hasn't been invented yet.

How far along today: 29 weeks + 2 days

Baby size:  At 29 weeks, baby was the size of a small cabbage, approximately 17 inches long and 2.9 lbs.  At his last ultrasound (21 weeks), he was starting to drop percentiles, just like his brother did and I am no longer measuring a week ahead, but more like a week behind.  At my 26 week visit, I was already a cm behind on fundal height, which is still considered normal, especially for a second pregnancy.  I'm hoping for an extra ultrasound after my next appointment (like I got with Liam at about 30 weeks).

Trimester: Let the fun begin.  Third trimester is here.  

Gender: As I announced in my Gender Reveal Post, it's a BOY!  

Name: This little guy's name will be Coen Gabor.  See my What's in a Name Post to see how we chose this name and why it is so special to us.

Movement: I'm past the stage of "I think I felt him!" I have no doubts that my little man is moving around.  It feels as if my whole stomach shifts at times or that he's focusing on punching/kicking his way out in one chosen area.  I love sitting and watching my belly move.  So far, he hasn't chosen to lay on one side over the other like Liam did (thankfully!).  Coen prefers to kick and wiggle.  The adorable hiccups have started, and boy does it feel strange to have your belly twitch rhythmically!  And the rhythm feels so much faster than I remembered.

Cravings: Peanut butter and bananas.  This sums up the last two months.  I have made countless peanut butter banana shakes and the hubby has picked up bananas for me on his way home from work when we ran out. The boys in my house do not share my love for these shakes.  But oh well, more for me and Coen ;).

I also went through a happy week of wolfing down muscadines.  There was a week or two of a carrot frenzy (my boys may have gotten tired of carrots to go with every meal) and Barberitos seems to call my name more often than it should.

Aversions: I have to think pretty hard to come up with aversions.  I'm pretty much an eating machine these days, but I did attempt to use up a can of corn from our pantry the other night and I couldn't eat more than a bite.  I understand why it sat there so long now.  Canned corn tastes weird to me and somehow my pregnant taste buds weren't having it at all.  Interestingly enough, overly sweet desserts make me feel sick.  This is strange because that is SO not me.  (Don't worry, chocolate cake doesn't count as overly sweet!)

The Not So Fun Pregnancy Stuff: Oh the emotions!  I have a lot of mood swings and considering we have a few major decisions coming up and in the works, that has NOT been helping.

I FEEL SO HOT!  Summer is my favorite season and has been as long as I can remember.  I love how pretty fall is but I always feel sad when the weather starts to cool down.  However, this year, I'm in a rush to have that happen.  Georgia is hot still.  We're seeing days in the high 90s with high humidity and I feel like I have an internal space heater on at all times.  Nights are the worst and we've slowly been creeping down on the thermostat and up on the ceiling fan speed (the latter of which my husband is VERY happy about).  He actually commented that he wakes up cold in the mornings (that's saying something if you know him!)

Sleep is getting harder as getting comfortable gets harder.  I don't know what I would do without the body pillow the hubs got me for our anniversary. I use it to prop myself up so I can somewhat sleep in my happy position still--on my belly.  Falling asleep seems to be less of a struggle now because of exhaustion, but staying asleep is another matter.  Some nights I feel like I get up to pee every 2 hours at least.  Sometimes I wake up just from back pain (which seems to be whenever I inadvertently roll onto my back and more and more frequently, in general, lately).  Other times, my little wiggle worm rouses me (the first time was at 23 weeks when he was attacking my belly button from the inside.  This sensation was accompanied by a horrible nightmare of someone punching me repeatedly in my belly button).  And of course, Liam has his rough nights every once in a while.

So far, sciatica has been at bay.  There are times when I get up from bed or from sitting for an extended period of time (when does that happen?!) and I feel a shot of pain down one leg (or both) but after a few steps, it seems to go away and this has only happened a handful of times so far so I can't complain.  Sciatica was my nemesis last pregnancy so it doesn't seem bad in comparison.

Worst moment: I failed my 1 hour glucose tolerance test.  My sugar was 143 (yep, cut off is 140).  With Liam, it was about 70 so I more than just a little freaked out.  I scoured the risk factor list and found that I meet exactly 0 of these so...I jumped to the most logical conclusion (OK, not exactly) but I decided I must be developing Type I diabetes and pregnancy was just unmasking it somehow.  After suffering (and I do mean SUFFERING) through the 3 hour test with my toddler, though, I am happy to report that my glucose was once again LOW at every single testing point.  The nurse says she has no idea what happened with my first test.  I'm just thankful to be back on the low side.  It's silly but I had to have one last piece of chocolate cake the night before my test when my fasting began.  And while I would have no problem sticking to the diabetic diet because I know how important it is, I am SO SO thankful that I don't have to give up my sweets.

Most exciting moments:  The hubs finally feeling Coen move around about two weeks ago was memorable.  I remember him having a lot of trouble sensing Liam's movements and how much it frustrated both of us.  Liam seemed to stop moving completely whenever he sensed a hand on my belly so it took more weeks and more patience for the hubs to finally feel him.  Coen thankfully is not so shy and I treasure sharing our baby boy with his Daddy so early on.

I hate to be a medical nerd but the milestone of hitting 24 weeks was huge to me.  My baby is viable!  He still needs to take his time of course.  We are in no rush for him to come yet, but if he did, he'd be welcomed to the NICU where his chances of survival are now (at almost 30 weeks) good.  Now that's a milestone to be excited about!

What I'm most looking forward to:  The next big things coming up for us are in October.  I'm looking forward to apple picking sometime in mid-October and Liam's two year old birthday at the end of the month. I'm pretty excited about his party. Of course Halloween comes right after that. We have a tradition of going to Boo at the Zoo and hopefully we will get to trick-or-treat as a family.  Fall with its cooler weather is probably the biggest thing I'm excited about right now though (and hopefully the first thing to happen!).

Big Brother: Big brother seems to be in the know about baby brother but it's hard to tell how much he understands.  He calls Coen "Kutch-Ko" and happily announces that Coen's room is "Kutch-Ko" and points to my belly and says "Kutch-Ko".  He also has a fascination with a library book we got two weeks ago called "Ellen and Penguin and the New Baby" (we had to recheck it today).  He begs for us to read "Baby" at least twice a day. The story is about a little girl with a new baby brother and how she views and comes to accept the changes the baby brings to her family.  He points to the baby in the book and says "Kutch-Ko" and "baby" and I explain that he will have a baby brother like that too.  I'm sure Coen will still come as a shock, but I'm hoping preparing him this way will help some.

In the whirlwind of a beautiful summer of two beach vacations and a trip alone with my better half, the weeks flew by.  Big brother is now completely transitioned to his big boy bed (even naps!) and has no desire to sleep in his baby crib because he's a "big boy!" like "Elmo" (who is his newest obsession along with the book "Elmo Loves You" that we also read multiple times a day every day). The only thing left in order to finish his big boy room is to take the crib out (which is just of matter of Daddy finding time to disassemble it now).

Liam has grown so much and is so tall!  Nagyi and Papi took us to Starbucks last weekend and as I looked at him sitting on his own chair, sipping his own hot chocolate, I had a realization that he really is a big boy now.  We even ended up having to turn his carseat to forward-facing this week because he is simply too tall to be rear-facing despite being well below the weight limit and me wanting to make it to that magical two years that the AAP recommends.  But that's parenting: changing plans from what you imagine as best to what actually works best for your child.  This is a lesson I've learned very well over the last two years.